The+Memory+Keeper's+Daughter


 * DIRECTIONS: Each student in the group is responsible for inventing one discussion question. This discussion question must be posted on the Monday of each week, ensuring time for discussion of each question. Each member of the group, including the person who invented the question, MUST respond to the discussion AT LEAST twice EACH week. Your participation in these online discussions, along with the amount of effort and reflection put into your responses, will account for a portion of your Literature Circle final grade. Each time you post a discussion question or a response,you MUST skip a space from what was written above, and you MUST begin your writing with your last name and first initial so I can mark your participation. It would also be helpful if you choose a specific colour and stick to that colour each week to identify yourself with also.

Week 4 Discussion Question: McCurdyJ- The book was concluded with Pheobe Paul and Norah all being reunited. There is a bit of awkwardness between Norah and Pheobe though, do you think Pheobe could ever have a close bond with Norah? What do you think the future holds for the characters? Will Pheobe get married? Can she live on her own and provide for herself? Do you think Paul will become an important part Pheobe's life with his move to Pittsburgh? Explain your thoughts.

LeemingJ- I think that they will becomer close, but it definately will not be the same as the relationship between Pheobe and Caroline. Only because Caroline has taken the mothering role in Pheobe's life. I think that overall the future looks good for the other characters, now that the secret has finally been revealed, it seems that they can all move on from that one instance that was controlling their lives. I hope that Pheobe gets married to Robert, she deserves it. And yes, she can provide for herself, she may not have the best paying job, but she does have the money left to her from David's death. She would not actually be on her own though, because she has Caroline, Al, Paul, Norah, and even Robert to look out for her. I hope that Paul and Pheobe become close, because they already seem to have an instant connection. I think that it will be easiest for Pheobe to accept a brother that having another Mother and Father, seeing as Al and Caroline already fill these roles.

McCurdyJ- I agree that they will get closer and I think that Pheobe will never be willing to allow Norah to be as close to her as Caroline is, which is unfortunate for Norah, considering that Norah had no control over this whole situation. I really like that Paul and Pheobe seem to be getting close though, this shows Paul's maturity as a growing character. I think that if Pheobe moved into that group home she would feel content to be on her own and at the same time Caroline and Al wouldn't always have to be around worrying, they could go out on the road a roadtrip and not have to worry so much. I think Pheobe is prepared to get married and will live a perfectly find life. I think that all the characters will live happy lives. Paul may not have a woman at the moment, but he is only 25 so i'm pretty sure a talented, sweet guy like him won't have any trouble settling down eventually.

LeemingJ- The ending was kind of bittersweet, in the way that they lost so much during the story (marriage, relationships, trust) that finally being together and knowing the secret is a relief even to me as a reader. I think that good things will happen to the characters in the future, and they will continue to bridge the gap that had been created so long ago.

McCurdyJ- That's true, the ending of the story, although it was a 'Happy ending' in a sense, it was also unfortunate. I am also happy that the 'cat is out of the bag.' I can't imagine the book ending without Norah or Paul knowing about Phoebe, that would be a terriable ending and I think I knew all along that they had to find out about her eventually, or else the entire plot would lead up to nothing and just make the reader upset with the loose ends, so I'm glad the author tied all the knots. I also think good things will happen for the characters, I think they have gone through a dramatic enough life that a calm ending to each of their lives is well deserved.

Week 3 Discussion Question: LeemingJ- It seems that David may never tell his secret, do you think that there will eventually be a reunion between Pheobe and Paul? How do you think that they will react to the knowledge that they have had a twin they did not know about? Will they have a relationship, how would it affect the two of them, or how will they be affected if they never meet?

McCurdyJ- I think at this point in the story, Norah or Paul or both have to find out about Pheobe for the story to be even worth reading. I don't think they could just build the story up so much and then just end without a conclusion to the whole situation. I think that Paul would be mad that his twin was living all this time, but I actually think he would react quite well because It's not exactly like this kid has lived a perfect life, he has been exposed and grew up with lies and secrets and having to just pretend he doesn't know anything. David and Norah haven't made it easy on Paul to grow up. Therefore, I believe that it wouldn't really take Paul by too much surprise that there are other secrets he doesn't know about. In all honesty, I don't think Pheobe really would have much of an idea of what was going on, I think the concept would be a little too complex for her, but I deffinatly think they could have a relationship, maybe not a super close one, but they should know each other. I don't think they would be effected if they never met because then they would never know about the other, but I just think that they deserve to know each other.

LeemingJ- Now that I've read the end of the book, it gives the answer to the question. I agree with what you said about how if they never met, Paul and Pheobe would not have changed much, because they never knew their lives to be any other way. I like the way their relationship seems to be headed at the end of the book, I was not sure how Paul would act around Pheobe because of her Down syndrome, but he seems to treat her well, and is surprised about how intelligent she actually is. Once again I feel kind of bad for Norah, because she never got to know her daughter in a mother daughter way. Pheobe thinks of Caroline as her mother, so Norah's place has been filled, Al and Caroline had no children of their own, so Pheobe seems pleased to have a brother.

McCurdyJ- I have personally not yet completed the reading for Tuesday, but from what I have so far read, I have noticed how mature Paul has become. The book really skipped into the future and we see Paul a man and in love. He appears to be a success in his music and his life is slowly coming together. I think that if he tried to have a relationship with Pheobe now he would be able to handle it. I think that if David would have told him earlier on in his life Paul would have thought the worse of it and done something stupid, like running away and stealing a car for example. Paul was not the most stable kid out there, therefore this leads me to believe that David was smart in the way that he didn't tell Paul about Pheobe too early. Pheobe has really surprised me with how accustomed she has become to everything around her, I honestly forget about her mental disability at times. This also leads me to believe that Pheobe would be able to have a good relationship with Paul. I agree with you though when you say that Norah can never truly be Pheobe's mother, Norah could never be the mother of her daughter because although Norah is her biological mother, Caroline is the mother who raised her who Pheobe has grown to know and love. Caroline could never be removed from Pheobe's life, but Norah could be added to it. Pheobe appears to be very open to having people in her life to love and who will love her in return.

LeemingJ- From the beginning it seemed that a reunion between Pheobe and Paul was inevitable, the two are twins. It was also obvious that it would be a bittersweet moment for the two families, finding out on what they had missed out on in each other's lives, and hopeful to what the future will eventually bring. Paul has definately matured, and I think this makes it the right time for him to find out about and meet his sister. As a teenager he was careless, and probably would not have accepted her. Pheobe has also grown up and is hopeful as to what her future will bring. It kind of bother's me that David died before this reunion happened, but then again I do not think that his family would have been able to forgive him for the secret he had held for twenty-five years.

Week 2 Discussion Question: McCurdyJ- As we have been reading we are shown the cons to David's decision of giving away Pheobe without Norah's knowledge. Norah and David's relationship appears to be getting distant and Norah has become a very over protective mother. Reflect on these details and other disadvantages to giving away his daughter. Was his decision worth it? Will Norah and David ever be able to build back their relationship? How does David's decisions affect Paul? Explain.

LeemingJ- David's decision to give away his daughter was not worth it at all, because of the secrets between him and Norah the two have grown too distant. Norah's even cheated on him because she does not feel any connection with David at all. I think that because David's decision led to so many other events that ultimately tore their family apart, they will never be able to build back their relationship. I feel bad for Paul, because he has never seen a functional family relationship, his parents closeness ended the day he was born, and now he is torn between two people who live seperate lives. David believes his decision has led to all these problems, and takes the blame for other people's mistakes.

McCurdyJ- David's decision of giving away his daughter appears to be the worst decision of his life. We saw that his decision was based because his sister, June, was born down syndrome as well and because of that his family had to suffer great loss when she died. I don't really think that's a good enough excuse though, seeing as pretending his daughter died did just as much damage if not more. Norah cheated on him with a guy she hardly knew! I agree with you that it's because she felt so disconnected from David, they aren't really even a married couple anymore, they are just two people living under the same roof living seperate lives. As it stands now I agree with you that they won't be able to build back their relationship because their relationship is built on secrets and lies, which isn't a healthy relationship at all. Paul has had to suffer a great deal, he doesn't really have parents he can have fun with or feel comfortable with, which is why I think he turned to music to express himself with.

LeemingJ- I find they are even more distant than you say, because neither of them are ever home, they have completly different lifestyles, and friends. Both are very consumed with their work, and use work to keep busy and ultimately "help" them forget all their problems. I do not think that their problem could be forgotten that easily, and I think the characters can see this too.

McCurdyJ- It appears that they are getting even more distant as time goes by, in the next reading we find out that David takes off to go to Pittsburgh and doesn't even tell anyone where he's going. Like he doesn't have to. I think that if my dad did that it would be a big deal, everyone in the family would be stressed out about his where abouts. I think that Norah uses work to escape reality but I think that David turns more towards photography to help himself cope with his issues and life. As far as I'm concerned, as far as Norah knows, their relationship is fixable because she doesn't know about the devistating lie David told. I feel like David knows that the relationship is over though and he knows its his fault. I think thats why he has been getting even more distant from Norah, it's almost like he's giving up because he can't fix what he did.

Week 1 Discussion** **Question: LeemingJ- We are reading about how life for the Henrys is playing out since David Henry's descision not to keep his daughter, Pheobe who was born with Down syndrome. Norah in particular feels a very deep void, believing that her daughter died at birth. Seeing this, how do you think life in the Henry family would have been different if they had kept Pheobe? Do you think it would have been better or worse? How would it affect each member? Explain.

JordanHoytT - I think their life would have been drastically different if David had not given Phoebe away. Instead of Norah's hurt and pain for the last year, she would have been a happy mother of two. I think it would benefit their family alot more because David's lies seem to be pushing the couple further apart. Even though their daughter had Down syndrome, it didn't necessarily mean she would die at such a young age like David's sister. Instead of trying to avoid the pain altogether and giving the baby away, I think the right decision would have been for him to be honest with Norah and come up with a consensus together.

LeemingJ- I argree with you there, although having a child born with Down syndrome would be awful, it is not nearly as bad as believing that the child is dead. I definately think that life for the Henry's would have been better if David had simply told the truth to his wife, then they could work together instead of growing farther apart. Norah probably would not be falling apart like she is now because she would have David to support her.

McCurdyJ - I agree with the fact that there lives are difficult either way, with or without Pheobe, I think though that a child is not just something you can throw away, no matter what is wrong with it you should love it and care for it no matter what the circumstances are. I think that their lives would be difficult if they kept Pheobe, but keeping her would have avoided a huge lie started by David and if this lie wasn't present in their lives I don't think that Norah and David would be getting distant. They both are grieving the loss of their daughter but in different ways. David knows that she is still alive, yet still he watches Norah torture herself day after day to avoid being honest with her. I think it would have been better off if they just kept Pheobe because relationships can't be based off of lies, and if David keeps lying to Norah and Norah finds out her daughter is alive, David and Norah will most likely be divorced.

LeemingJ- At this point in the novel, I'm thinking that they may become divorced wheater or not Norah knows the truth. I suppose their realtionship would not be so messed up had David simply told the truth in the first place. And sure David watches Norah torture herself everyday about his lie, but how could he ever tell her now? There's no way. One thing that does bother me is how David shows little or no remorse towards his daughter, it does not even seem to bother him that he abbandoned her to someone he barley knows. I feel kind of bad for Paul, the poor kid is caught in the middle of two very confused parents. **
 * McCurdyJ - I agree with you, but at the same time, I think the only reason they're getting distant is because of the lie in the first place. I feel that if he had not of lied to her they would be a perfectly happy family with their two children, obviously it would be a bit of a struggle trying to get Pheobe to adapt quickly, but totally managable. I think that David owes it to Norah to tell her about his lie, I have a feeling that she's going to figure it out sooner or later and I just feel like if I were her I'd rather find out from David, than someone like Caroline. But at the same time I realize it's a hard thing to bring up, like they couldn't just be at the supper table and then "Oh by the way, our daughter is alive" Yeah, that wouldn't fly. I don't know how he could tell her, but I still think it would be a good idea, because either way, their relationship is getting distant and appears it won't last, and how could it since its built on a major lie. I agree with you about feeling bad for Paul, I can't imagine growing up with a long lost twin. Also the fact that since Pheobe "died" at birth, Norah seems to be over protective of Paul, I'm kind of curious if once he hits his teens if he will rebel or something because his parent's are too uptight and over protective. **